Tim and Cali co-authored the #1 best -selling book, I Married A Junkie. Hear more stories from Tim and Cali in this riveting book, on how a relationship can survive addiction!
Have you ever wanted a “do over” in life? Have you ever wished you could go back in time to change something that has caused a negative chain reaction of events in your life? Well, as much as we wish this was possible the decisions we make today can, and will, affect our lives for years to come and possibly permanently. This is why it is extremely important to make good sound decisions as we are trying to beat the deadly cycle of addiction and stay clean and sober. But let’s pretend for a moment that you could go back in time to that moment in life right when you were offered opiates for the first time. Let’s pretend that you are being given a chance to talk to yourself and talk yourself out of ever trying opiates for that first time. What would you say to yourself? What thoughts would come to your mind?
Here are five things I would tell myself to try to talk me out of ever picking up opiates.
1. OPIATES WILL TAKE YOUR PASSIONS FROM YOU- One of the things I would tell myself is that opiates will take all your passions from you. When explaining this there is a “matter of fact” reasoning for this and there is a physiological reasoning for this. Once the hardcore physical addiction kicks in with opiates, and it always does, getting high will become all that matters to you. Your dreams, hobbies, hopes and love will all disappear. Things that meant the most to you will no longer exist. You will feel nothing for the things that once motivated you in life. Now, there is a physiological reason for this. Opiates “highjack” the pleasure center in the brain making it nearly impossible to feel for the passions in life that you once cherished. The good news is that your brain will reset itself, but only when you stop using.
2. OPIATES WILL TAKE YOUR FINANCES- It never fails with this one. Like Axl Rose of Guns n Roses said, “I used to do a little but a little wouldn’t do so a little got more n more”! The famous lyrics to their song “Mr Brownstone” couldn’t be more true. With opiates it always starts off semi-manageable. But it always gets to a point where you are spending every penny you have to maintain your opiate addiction. College funds are destroyed. Savings accounts are destroyed and weekly paychecks are used to keep yourself from getting sick. There is no way around this one, your finances will be destroyed.
3. OPIATES WILL TAKE YOUR HEALTH– I’ve met so many opiate addicts, myself included, who were in stellar shape before heroin only to either gain weight from laying around or lose enormous amounts of weight from not eating at all. With myself, I loved the gym and went every day before heroin. I had plenty of energy to get up at 4am, work out and then work a full 8 hour work day. But as my heroin addiction grew, my energy level lowered to a point that it was hard enough to just get out of bed in the morning to score my first fix of the day. In a matter of weeks I went from an every day gym rat to an out of shape, unhealthy heroin addict.
4. OPIATES WILL TAKE YOUR SEX LIFE-A lot of people don’t realize this one until it is way too late. Like we discussed earlier, opiates highjack the pleasure center in the brain which, in turn, completely shuts off the human sex drive. Imagine if you were about to try this drug for the first time and someone told you that in a short period of time you will have absolutely zero sex drive. Would you still try the drug? I know I wouldn’t. But once you are trapped in the physical cycle of opiate addiction you really have no choice. So if you are ready for a life time of no sex then by all means, have at it!
5. OPIATES WILL TAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS– During the peak of my heroin addiction I remember my wife sadly telling me that I was no longer married to her, I was married to heroin. Now that I sit back and dissect her words it is horribly true. I was giving heroin the attention that is supposed to be for her. I was giving the time to heroin that was supposed to be for her. I was giving my finances to heroin that were meant to be for her. So I was married to heroin for a while. I had no time or energy for any other relationships during that time period. And the worst part is that during this time period we aren’t consciously suffering. Our partners and spouses are. They are the ones spending endless amounts of time alone while we tend to our addiction.
—Tim Estes
So, even though it is impossible to go back in time and have a conversation with ourselves before we try opiates for the first time it is not impossible to have this conversation with ourselves if relapse is on our mind. Or better yet, we can have this conversation with a friend or loved one if they are on the verge of making the biggest mistake of their life by trying opiates for the first time. The Addictions Coach, we specialize in getting addicts clean and sober and keeping addicts clean and sober. We have many addiction recovery based programs that are available and we will come to the addict and create a program specific to them. You can get information on all of our recovery based programs through our website at http://www.theaddictionscoach.
