The Addictions Coach Creates a Mobile Couples Coaching Practice
Miami, Florida July 3, 2012
The Addictions Coach created a mobile couples coaching practice to assist addicts and their families in understanding the addiction dynamic and how it affects the couples specifically in their marriage. Cali Estes, of the Addictions Coach, found a need for spouses and families to understand what the addict is experiencing and how it may impact their marriage specifically and began offering couples coaching sessions in the comfort of the couple’s home.
The Minnesota Model of Addiction allots for the addict to attend therapy and rehab for 28 days to 6 months and then places them either in sober living or returns them to the home. There is little contact with the family or spouse due to HIPPA regulations and the family knows little of what occurs in the rehab itself. Cali found a need to fill that void and offer a way to connect the spouses to the addicts and work on key elements in their marriages that may not be in other marriages when dealing with the additional element of addiction.
“Traditional rehabs focus on the addict only, separate them from their family for 30 days and then expect a reintegration into the family without any explanations and education to the spouse,” Cali said. “This sets both the addict and the spouse up for failure in the marriage and leaves the spouse wondering what he or she could have done differently. This is where we come in and solve that problem.”
Cali’s multidimensional approach focuses on the underlying cause of the addiction and she approaches each couple in a unique manner. She takes into account what specific stressors the couple is dealing with, what the addict in the relationship has been experiencing and what behaviors as a couple they would like to see change. Unlike traditional rehabilitation centers that convince the addict that they have an incurable disease that no one will ever understand including their spouse, Cali tailors her program to fit the client and encourages open communication and sharing between couples.
“I do not tell the addict that they are not well and have a disease,” Cali said. “It implies that they are inferior in the relationship and causing the problems. This leads to disharmony in the marriage and resentments among partners. I approach the couple on an even playing field and address all behaviors as fixable and changeable to preserve the marriage. “
By realizing that each couple is unique and each person’s pattern of addiction is unique with a root cause, Cali is able to address the addiction at the core and assist the couple in making the necessary changes and positive steps in their life. Cali is more than a ‘sober coach’. She has a background in clinical and personality psychology, addictions and forensics. She can get to the root of the addiction quickly and work with the couple in addressing all the mitigating factors surrounding both the addiction and the lifestyle stressors that affect the marriage. She is proactive in creating a safe environment in which to make the changes necessary to live a productive lifestyle as team.
Clients in addiction feel powerless, helpless and hopeless and need answers and ways to change their lives. Sometimes family and friends think that everyone should be able to have ‘just one drink’ at a function, but for some clients that is not what happens. That one drink turns them into an unmanageable individual that their family and friends cannot deal with. Taking a pill to ‘get through the day’ or ‘take the edge off’ eventually leads to a full blown addiction with the addict personality. Cali can address all these issues with the client and their spouse and assist the spouse in ways to handle the addict personality and work together to achieve a happy marriage and partnership.
Cali has consulted in 2 countries and frequently flies between South Florida, New York and Los Angeles to work with her clients. She has clients in the music industry, acting/film, modeling, CEO’s and frequent high stress jobs clients. She is available on an individual basis for clients, more intensive or for speaking engagements. She has accompanied clients to high risk situations like weddings, worked ‘on set’ of movie and film productions, worked directly with pro athletes, sat in on business meetings, been ‘on tour’ with musicians and even will work directly in the home of the client for a more intensive ‘rehab’ setting.
“I work with couples in the traditional one hour a week sessions, but I am also available to assist clients on tour, on movie sets, or for 30 day stays in their home,” Cali said. “For a high powered CEO, doctor, musician or actor that does not have the time to spend in a residential rehab, I can bring the rehab to them. I specialize in high profile clients that also cannot attend AA and NA meetings due to their status and possibly running into a client.”
Cali is available for individual hourly sessions, intensive sessions (7-4 days) and even will live with the client for 30 days. She offers outdoor couples retreats and provides coaching and therapy in serene and comfortable environments. Her pleasing personality and unique approach to sobriety and addiction allows her to get the root cause of the problem in the marriage quickly and offer solutions.
The Addictions Coach is based out of Miami Florida but services clients in all of South Florida, New York City and Los Angeles.